12 March, 2008

I’ll Buy that for Pound!

Rejoice ladies and gentlemen because you can now buy your very own football ground. Stockport County’s Edgeley Park is currently up for sale for the princely sum of one pound, but don’t let the disproportionate cost put you off because I imagine you can just disband the whole team and be left with your very own football pitch. Not even the guys on ‘Cribs’ have that!

Wait, no, as ever the small print tells the real story. The actual plan is to raise £1 million in total (through supporters and presumably the mentally suspect), as a deposit to buy back the stadium from a secret faceless consortium who bought the ground as leverage to off-set against the club’s seriously escalating debts 5 years ago. The board have therefore devised a simple ‘pixel sale’ as they call it, and all you need to do to contribute is buy a few pixels (costing just £1 each) from Groundforapound.com. Here you can then use your pixels to advertise your website, business, sexual preference etc for all Country fans around the world to see!

It’s such a smashing idea that the STT editorial team has already pooled our weekly wages together to buy up more than 3 pixels ourselves, and if you turn on ultra-high magnification over the bottom left-hand corner of the screen you will find our 4-pixel message: “Macclesfield 4 Eva. County suc cox.” The website helpfully informs us that there are a couple of pixels still on the market (960,600 of em actually) should you see fit to splash out, so please, let’s all help Stockport out by purchasing just enough pixels between us to draw a huge penis in the middle of their pitch.