28 February, 2008

Mr Nice Guy?

He’s the face of middle class football, the BBC and also Walkers Crisps, so beneath that competently ironed shirt and silver fox hairstreaks Gary Lineker must be perfect, right? On the pitch, his behaviour was always exemplary; never received a booking, never mouthed off at an official and never even casually mooned the opposition fans. Off the pitch however, his busy hands are as legendary as his England goal-scoring record, although it’s hard to find much solid fact to back up the numerous stories of what he got up to in sextra time, as he reportedly used to call it.

His 20 year marriage dissolved a couple of years ago now, amid constant hearsay in the press that he was seeing a string of women behind his wife’s back, but there was strangely no suggestion in the actual courtroom that this was the motivating factor of the split. Various names have been mentioned time and time again in the press, but like any good cad, Lineker is always quick to point out their long friendship, or the woman’s husband, or that really he prefers gingers. Barbados neighbour Denise Moore, part-time punching bag Ulrika Jonsson, professional exhibitionist Tara Stout and Eimear Montgomerie, ex-wife of golfer Colin, are just four names from the spotlight that Lineker has been seen with, but to be honest, there seems to be little more to go on than conjecture and the odd handjob.

With an estimated fortune of over £30million though, and a smile that says “don’t worry my bed has waterproof sheets,” it’s no wonder that Lineker hasn’t exactly hung around waiting to court his ex-wife all over again. No instead he has done the best thing a man can do; date a girl nearly half his age with huge cans. Danielle Bux is the lucky lady’s name, and the 28 year old air stewardess / model has already been treated to sexy parties in Miami, Rome, Vienna, Barbados and Leicester, although reports of them joining the mile-high club are yet to be confirmed or denied. With previous WAG experience attached to ex-Coventry centre-back Adam Willis, as well as Scottish egg-chaser Simon Danielli, she seems perfect to step into the breach, however the Daily Fascist thinks otherwise, actually having the audacity to call her a “poisoned chalice” earlier this year. So what else is there to say about her? Well not much…other than to wish her lots of luck taking her top off to kickstart that modelling career. Check the slightly too racy for work pics at the NOTW.

We leave you then with something quite bizarrely hot, as Ms Bux stars in a recent music video which rips off 80s teen ‘classic’ Weird Science. The good stuff begins about a minute and a half in, and as ever, enjoy with the sound off…